EPISODE CXX - UNCLE BILL'S EPISIOTOMY




Reed spotted Number Two gesticulating across the compound from him.  Evidently they were as concerned with Sheriff Doody's plight as he, but the commander had come to expect a bit more professionalism from Lt. Scott.  His attention was yanked back to the house when gun fire erupted within.  No rounds came their way, but shots were returned, though they also seemed to come from within Tex's domicile.

"The Sheriff's in trouble!", Mr. Proteau exclaimed, "We have to help him!"

"Negative.", Reed replied, placing a restraining hand on the security officer's arm, "Nobody move."

Time drew out slowly as they waited for some indication of the Sheriff's status.  After a few long minutes, the front door creaked open and Doody emerged.  His eyes searched the surroundings and settled on Reed and his team.

"Y'all can come out.  It's clear.", the Sheriff called out, "Tex is dead."

Something in Doody's' demeanor caused Reed to hesitate, though Orwig and Mr. Jeffy scrambled forward without hesitation.

"Wow!", Jeffy exclaimed, smiling broadly, "How'd you do it?!?"

Doody returned the engineering officer's smile.  "Like this", he said, aiming his pistol at Mr. Jeffy's head.

Ever a stranger to subtlety, Jeffy proceeded forward.  "I know you did it with your gun, goof-ball", he commented, "but how did you get into the house without getting hurt?"

"Hold it right there!", Doody demanded, surprised at the boldness of Marshal Reed's presumed lapdog.

"Wow!", Jeffy said in wonder, "just like that.  'Hold it right there', huh?"  He shook his head again, chuckling.  "Good one."

Doody thumbed his pistol's hammer back.  "I'm serious, boy", he said, his voice taking on a tinny edge, "not one step closer."

Jeffy did not take another step, doubled over with laughter as he was.  "That's great", Jeffy howled, "man that's funny.  Just like some old, hokey western!"

Wiping tears away with his sleeves, the engineering officer didn't see Doody's grip tighten on the pistol.