EPISODE XVIII - LOOPY THE FLYING SEAL AND THE CIRCUS OF CARNAGE
Back in the Commander's Quarters...
The blade in Reed's hand had just begun its deadly plunge toward Stauch's unprotected nether regions, when something strange occurred. The heavy oaken chair at his back reached out, wrapping its ligneous
appendage around Reed's wrist, halting the momentum of his deadly, or at least painfully emasculating, strike.
Reed's eyes widened in shocked disbelief as he attempted to pull free of the chair's vice-like grip. He watched in amazement as the recently animated piece of furniture began to alter shape, becoming, somehow,
humanoid. The arm of the chair which held his wrist became a hand and, as the wooden monstrosity came to its now humanesque feet, its features became recognizable.
"Proteau!!", Spittle flew from Reed's mouth as he raged, "How......why?!?"
Calmly, Proteau explained. "Mr. Schultz asked me to come to your quarters for this discussion, but not as a participant."
"This reeks of mutiny!", Reed snarled to no one in particular.
"You see", Proteau continued, "I chose this form due, primarily, to it's unremarkable qualities. Though tasteful and certainly sturdy, it wouldn't draw the eye like the rest of your furniture.
Therefore, it was the ideal..."
"Mr. Proteau.", Schultz interrupted quietly.
"Yes?"
"Perhaps", he suggested, "we should continue this discussion once the Commander has been moved to a secured area."
"You'll never get away with this.", Reed growled, struggling againstStauch and Proteau, "I'll see you all hanged for treason.", he grinned maniacally, "and then I'll take a stick and bash your
dead carcasses until the candy falls out."
Reed broke off into an insane fit of laughter, the sound reverberating disturbingly as it bounced around the room. Sighing resignedly, Schultz stepped forward and administered the "Huckster Face Grab".
