EPISODE CLXVII - RABBI RON AND THE DRADLE OF DEATH
DANA stared menacingly at three occupants of the NCO Club, his gaze focusing on Jeffy as the engineering officer moved to pull the back of his hospital gown closed.
"You are out of uniform", the malfunctioning security drone advised Mr. Jeffy. "That is unacceptable."
He moved toward the bar, daring the others to come to the baffled officer's aid. Broski tensed, preparing to make a grab for his splazer, but Marx was quicker.
"Can I get you a drink, son", he asked the agitated android.
DANA stopped, his crazed eyes centering on the bartender, who simply continued polishing a glass he'd grabbed from behind the counter.
"You are not my father, biological beverage vender", DANA replied flatly, "for I was created in a laboratory, and no, I do not require any fluids at this time, though it was polite of you to ask."
"Well what can I get you then?", Marx asked, not dissuaded by the danger lingering behind the androids glare.
"I only seek the destruction of all living bipedal organisms located on this vessel", DANA informed him.
"Can't help you there, friend", Marx said noncommittally, "but I'll tell ya' what..." The glass he'd been polishing slipped out of his hand and fell to the floor. "Dad blast it!",
Marx exclaimed, reaching behind the bar to retrieve it.
DANA didn't seem to notice, but turned again toward Mr. Jeffy. "Regulation 39-2 clearly states", he lectured, "that proper attire will be worn in all areas of the ship, with the exception of one's
own quarters and the Erotic Hologram compartment."
Jeffy slid out of his chair, placing it between himself and the oncoming android. "I just wanted to get a drink", he nearly shouted. "I didn't think..."
An explosion from behind the bar caused an abrupt halt in his explanation. He hit the ground and rolled, as he was trained to do in Junior Cadets, holding his hands to his ears and screaming*.
He looked up to see Marx leaning over the bar, a huge smoldering rifle in his hands. Broski was just picking himself off of the ground, smiling and shaking shards of broken glass out of his hair.
"Nice shootin', Sarge", the corporal praised.
"Thank you", Marx replied, blowing at the wisp of smoke that drifted from the monstrous barrel. "I thought this would come in handy one day."
Jeffy looked over to where DANA had been standing, but the android wasn't there anymore. Instead, he lay in a charred and blackened heap several yards behind his previous location, limbs jutting out at unnatural
angles, and wires poking through his synthetic skin.
"I ain't seen a Shatblaster-4 in years", Broski was saying, admiring the huge weapon, "and that was in a museum. How'd you get your hands one?!?"
"I sent away for it", Marx explained. "Got a bitchin' set of knives with it. I can even cut a tin can with 'em."
"Wow", Broski muttered, still marveling at the massive gun.
"Uh, guys", Jeffy's voice drifted over.
"What?", the corporal inquired irritably, not taking his eyes off the black, steel work of destructive beauty.
"I think we have a problem."
Both Marx and Broski looked up at the engineering officer's statement, their eyes following his fear filled gaze to where DANA was beginning to get up.
