EPISODE XXIII - DOES MY BUTT LOOK BIG IN THESE PANTS?




The short flight to the planet's surface was uneventful, and the shuttle holding Lt. Scott's team touched down lightly on Smedley-7, just beyond the outer walls of the farming colony known as New Boise.

"Nice landing, Lieutenant.", Number Two observed as Schrader shut down the shuttle's main drive.

"Ah, that's nothin' man", the pilot said modestly, "like shooting fish in a small, enclosed area where ya' can't hardly miss."

Scott nodded slowly, "Er...yeah.  Like a barrel, or something."

"Yeah man, like that."

Mr. Proteau, Stauch, and the two squads assigned to the security detail moved to the hatch.  Lt. Scott checked the environmental readouts again, noting no new concerns.  He gave Proteau the thumbs up.

The Security Officer triggered the hatch, and the door opened onto the barren countryside of Smedley-7.  The two squads spread out, finding cover easily on the craggy ground.  Stauch surveyed the area more closely, taking in the harsh terrain.  He'd trained on similar ground while in the infantry, and recognized its unforgiving nature.  He motioned the first squad forward, and signaled the second to set up a perimeter around the ship.

"All clear.", he said into his headset.

Proteau and the two lieutenants exited the shuttle and found cover near his position.  Proteau pointed a rectangular device toward the colony, concentrating on the display screen.

"No signs of life, Lieutenant.", he said curiously.

Scott digested this new information, although he'd already formulated a plan for this possibility.  "Sergeant", he said, "will this terrain provide adequate coverage for your team to approach the compound?"

Stauch reassessed the area between his position and the colony.  "I think we can manage it, Lieutenant."

"Then make it so, Sergeant."

The team moved fluidly, with Sgt. Stauch taking the point more often than not.  He was the first to reach the outer wall of New Boise, and signaled the "all clear".  The officers moved to his location cautiously.  Stauch pointed to the gates twenty yards down the wall.

"That's our next stop", he said catching his breath, "but the power has been off for some time", he shook his head, inhaling dusty air, "I don't think we're going to be able to get the gates open."

"Well, let's take a look.", Scott said, moving toward the gateway.

Stauch, surprised by the young officer's haste, motioned for everyone to remain where they were, and rushed to catch up with the lieutenant.  Scott was already working on the release mechanism when the sergeant arrived at the gate.  He placed himself in a position he hoped would cover the lieutenant as he worked on the gate.  After several seconds, Stauch risked a glance over his shoulder.  The lieutenant had the entire control panel dismantled and was sorting through the complex network of multi-colored wiring inside.  He'd cut and reconnected several wires and glanced up at the sergeant meaningfully as he brought the last two free wires together.

A low mechanical hissing sound accompanied the opening of the gates.  Stauch placed the lieutenant behind him and peered around the corner.  When he turned back, his face pale.  He swallowed hard and motioned the rest of their party forward.  Scott, noting his haunted expression, stepped around Stauch and looked for himself.  He didn't like what he saw.